Letting Go...

Alright, its not a poem but its a story. Things that I'm going through...Losing my true love.

I have been through hell for quite some times. I was indecisive… whether to let go, or to hold on. I tried to let go, but I could not. It was too hard for me. You may see a smile upon my face, but I was suffering the whole time. My heart was crying. It was not that easy to pretend that everything’s ok, and it was hard to hide the pain. It was the worst feeling that I have ever been through. Obviously, I would not want anyone to go through what I have been through…especially my girls and people around me. It hurts, really bad. There is nothing I could do, when I know a part of me is missing. Each night I would cry myself to sleep, thinking that I would have to face the next day alone, without him, the love of my life. The moment I wake up, I would cry again, knowing that he is no longer with me… I kept thinking, how am I supposed to face each day…when I need him so much. He was there all along…and suddenly he left, without reason. I dont understand why. I have never cheated on him, I never lied to him, I never cross the line…I was loyal all the time. Still, I didn’t know what did I do wrong. I tried to work things out, begged him for a second chance but he would not let me to. I have always wanted to be there for him all the time, and I have always wanted to be part of him. I had so many dreams, which I include him in each of it. Now that everything has been ruined. I tried my best, I did all I could to repair our relationship but I lost. And I left with no tears to cry, anymore. I loved him too much, that makes it hard for me to move on. It was too painful… I can’t even describe my feelings but it was really bad. Now, I have made a decision. Its not that I’m giving up but I have to let go. I have to sacrifice and let him be happy, even if I’m not part of his happiness. I believe that everything happens for the best. I have learned, discovered, and I need to grow.

To him,
I hope one day he will realize that my feelings are real and I will always, always love him. And I still pray that there will be another chance for our love…

And to my friends, especially my girls,
thanks for being there all the time... I owe you girls a lot.