Dear Diary

May 8, 2005

Dear Diary, It has been a long time. I still miss this girl and I crush on her. I want to make a love song for her and make her smile. I always meet her on Friday, Saturday and Sunday. Sometimes it is hard to talk something with her. And even just make a little chat. All I can do is just see her happiness, smile and laugh. People like her. She is categorized as popular girl. Her love is shared to another, it is equal. I wonder how this girl can do this thing. Does she has someone in hers’ heart? Someone who can make her happy and make her dream come true as a normal young teenage girl that full of love. am sure she has. But this is not the right time. Her father said,” She is allowed to date after she reaches 18 years old” I really love her so much and I will wait for 2 years and even more.
Nothing can change my love to her. My heart has frozen I cannot receive another girl’s heart for I love her much. Does two years looks like a century? With love, it looks like things happen yesterday. I could not tell her I love her. I could not ask, “Would you be my girl?” All I can do just make a love song. Write my heart on paper, strum on my new guitar and pray to God. I really want to ask directly Do you love me? Or would you be my girl? But I am so afraid yeah... I am so lame
I am just an ordinary man with a cool stuff and she will ask me if I have a new on what I wear. What love is all about? God is love and He gave us unconditionally love to us. Should I do the same things for this girl? I wonder this is a question for me to find the answer and I do not have the answer. Someday I will get it. God has provided everything for me, yes, it is true. His plans are the best for me and for the one I love. Ashley, I love you so much.