I hate this
I’m happy when I’m with friends
But then my mind gets the better of me
Then I start to realize, how fcked up my life is
I hate it all so fcking much
The drug, the guys, the parties, the late nights
I try and try to make it all go away
To block out these thoughts
But they just keep coming back
I want to run
To run far away
To never return or look back
To leave this town forever
To leave the memories behind
Good and bad
But, then I think of my friends
How they would cry, how they would worry
And what if they found me?
I don’t think I could handle that
And what about my family?
How they would miss me,
And blame themselves
It’s my fault and no one else’s
And if I don’t run, this feeling will slowly eat away at my soul
And kill me from the inside
Or maybe I’m just to scared to face this alone?
Friends have given up hope on me
But I am afraid that I have given up on myself
Well I guess there’s nothing left I can do
I’ll just carry on
Waking up and putting on a fake smile
And carry on slowly dieing
With my soul yearning to be free
Well I guess I will never know what is to happen next
But all I know is
I have two choices
Live or die.
