Loneliness and Letting go

*I know this poem is kind'a long..
Just try reading it.. Of all the poems i posted this is the one i like the best. *

It's amazing how at a state of drunkenness one
can realize how many things that life has to
offer. It can alter one's sensibility. Albeit three
bottles of tequila shared with trusted friends.
I beg to disagree with the so many things that
seem to crop out of my emotions.
Loneliness seems to be that one big hurdle that
we have to jump out of. It brings us to a
blinding haze that conquers any sense left, and
after that haze we find ourselves trapped in one
ridiculous predicament. A maze with no way out.
Then we begin to confuse loneliness with love.
Does these two really differ?
Experience, experience, experience... do i have
really that much to make me conclude the real
meaning of loneliness and love? I guess so. I
guess it's what pushed me to withstand those
three bottles shot after shot..
Can you really begin to imagine that one person
could awaken so much emotion you never thought you have.
Not knowing and not seeing, you find yourself
blinded by so much light and happiness that one
abyss so dark and so lonely shocks you..
And then it sinks in that you're in that darkness..
I dont want to sound bitter but i guess i just have to
accept that with that bright light comes this
bitterness and pain. We just have to accept and
feel that, that one smile, one message of
endearment, one pet name and our multitude of
over analization has grounded us into that one
painful mousetrap. Snap!! and you're scarred.
Even if you're not keloidal it remains! One big
red and swollen scar.
I would contradict myself but i'd have to say
it's all so worth it! It may be painful but its
one glorious reminder of although mind & heart
shattering but amazing experience.
I need and have to let you go.. and one day i
know i will. It confuses you but you know it
confuses me too.
If you read this which i doubt
you will.. you know its you.
My heart breaks but you're the reason why my
heart beats anyway. I have to pretend that it
beats for someonelse but it only does for you.

My friends, i can, i will break free of this stupor..

il let go of you. I dont know if i really love you
but my world turns around you without your knowing.
Soon it will jut stop though..
and i know i'll live..
I was looking for you.. and i found you..
but then i have to lose you so i can still have me...

*comments?*