Can't Close My Eyes

I can't close my eyes
afraid of what lies behind
or what I'll find in front,
when i open them back up

afraid of seeing your face there
touching me, kissing me
telling me not to be scared
turning me into this w.hore everyone sees

why does she still like you?
doesn't she learn from my mistakes?
Ive given her many reasons,
to kill you before you wake.

Which I would do myself
if i didn't want to die every time i see you
If I didn't crumble when you walk behind me
If you weren't the reason I was crying.

The worst thing is, I could've stopped it.
I could've not let you take advantage.
now I know I could've fought it,
before you made me anymore damaged.