She's Gone

Why is this hurting me, why do I feel the need to lie?
Why do I still not want to hurt your feelings, and not want to see you cry?
Why can’t I just be honest, though honesty would be cruel
Why can’t I make you stop hurting yourself, instead I watch you act like such a fool

Day after day, you tell me I don’t care
as day after day, I watch you standing there
I’m always wondering what reality is in your delusional mind
but when I ask, you laugh and say you’re not crazy, you’re just a step behind

everyone around you can see the one thing you cannot
if your life was a movie, you’d completely miss the plot
you constantly worry about nonexistent problems
Mom, if they don’t exist...IT’S IMPOSSIBLE TO SOLVE THEM!

Its so hard to watch you fall into your unnecessary depression
I wish I could show you, you really need help, you’re life is a complete reflection
of all the years of abuse and neglect, and all the times people did you wrong
that doesn’t justify you losing your mind and the ones who have loved you all along

now Im sitting here, and I really don’t know what to do
I miss the woman who was my mommy, but I hate what you’ve turned into...
So, you let it drive you crazy, and now you’re really gone
I wish you would have taken my advice, you could have just moved on....

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
This poem is dedicated to my mom.