Slowly killing me

When he left
I thought a part of me died
I really couldn't help
all the tears I cried

when he walked out
my heart shattered in two
all I ever wanted
was to have a love so true

when he was with her
my smile would fade away
after all we went through
I still thought he would stay

when he started drugs
and said I wouldn't understand
I started to blame myself
and my cutting once again began

when he said he loved me
I thought he'd eventually be back
I told him I don't need him
but my world went completely black

when he told me to forget him
I knew I had to let him go
I would never forget
why didn't he ever know?

when he said he'd die without me
I actually believed it was true
I thought we'd make it
just me and you

when I knew he kissed her
I knew he didn't feel the same way
so I'd live lonely
for yet another day

when he said he'd never hurt me
I thought in him I could trust
but I guess I was wrong
to him it was only lust

when he said we'd be together forever
I knew it was a lie
I was never happy with him
he always made me cry

when he got mad at me
he said it one day be in the past
I thought he was different
that this time it would last

when he wrote me letters
he said he'd always be mine
but I guess love dwindled away
I knew it would in time

when he read my poems
he said I already had his heart
but it ended up I never had it
not from the very start

when I started cutting
he said he didn't cause this
I always wondered if I died
If I'd ever be anyone he would miss

when I attempted suicide
he said I still love you
but I knew he loved her
and what you told me wasn't true

when he said it was over
I told him I would die
he said he didn't mean that much to me
that night all I did was cry

when he left
he said one day I'd see
that I couldn't live without him
but being with him is slowly killing me...