Non-friendships

I thought you knew
the true me
i thought you were my best friend
i thought you could see

but as i look
and read the note
you two passed back and forth
i couldn't help but cry

how could i have been so stupid
i cant help that I'm extreme
why couldn't you see
that shell wasn't me

yet you get pissed
and called me names
saying you hated me
how could i be so stupid

i have told you over and over again
i wouldn't never like some one like that
i would never try to take him away
from the two i used to love the most

i thought i could trust you
with my heart and with my soul
i never thought u would betray me
but you did and i can never forgive myself

I'm not going to go
back to the knife
i made a vow to myself
yet i want it so bad

if you wanted me gone
then why didn't u tell me so
last month i would have had no problem
with just pulling the trigger

if you hated me
why didn't you tell me so
i have better friends than u
who know me
who wouldn't care about my flirting

never did i think
that u guys would betray me
yet today when u said Ur sorries
and i didn't mean it's

i told u it was fine
and that i didn't care
but the truth is
that i lost my two best friends

i can never forgive the way
you acted towards something so stupid
and forever will i never trust you
but i don't know if i can just sit
and take all this s hi t in

I'm broken and lost
without you two on my side
i hate it to death
I've got to protect myself

i will never again
hurt myself in such a way
but I've got to figure out a way
to let my pain run free