Fear of who... Fear of me

I count the lonely nights,
One by one they pass ever so slowly,
As I sit alone in a corner,
Trapped by my own fear,
Held hostage by what I truly am,
Left by myself to figure things out,
But I have reached the end of this,
And I shall take the blade to my wrist,
For that is my last resort.

Its because Im afraid of what I might do,
What I'm capable of,
So many fears...,
So many worries,
I wish not that pain come upon you,
I pray for safety,
Will it come??

Even in the most holliest of nights,
My eyes, bloodshot,
My cheeks, red from crying,
I just want to cry this out of me,
So I will end it, right here, right now,
So only I have to suffer,
And everyone will be put at ease,
Knowing I'm dead and buried.

So I grab the knife,
And slash it across my veins,
And watch tearily,
As my blood, life source,
pours out of me,
So no longer.... will I cry in vain,
No longer will I have to be afraid,
SO I take one last gasp for breath,
And....... goodbye.....