by shannon Jun 1, 2005
category :
Sadness, depression /
about depression
Numb, I lay here in my bed |
by Tina
Omg shannon, this is an amazing poem...one of the best i've read...great job |
by David Paul
hmmm this one is a little different. Lets see here. You have a good sense of where your going in your poems and they really get there point across, but I think you need to expand your vocabulary a little more. In the ones I've read I've seen alot of the same rhymes. If thats what you do thats ok. Its not going to take away on your ratings, but try to challenge yourself to using different words. Good job though. Never Give Up. kilman = David B. |
by Robert
To me you never really showed me how this was a nightmare you never tied it in at all. It was like you were just complaining to nothing and hoping the pain or hurt would end. You never constructed it to be a nightmare at all. Sorry maybe next time... |
by Chad
That is very good. |
by Sarah Ann
Aww...that was really good. |