Can I...?

My mind is clashing.and yet im laughing.am I crazy?or just dum?No, im just lazy. life aint always fun.
Every mistake comes back with a low blow.every step u take leads you somewhere u dont wanna go.
am I going in the right direction? is there something wrong with my reflection?is there something I dont know?tired of going insane. wanna break free of all chains. can I sneak out at night to see him?or even just to cry?Will love soon be at my door?or will I fall and hit the floor?Im sleeping awake.im tired of breaks.dont wanna sit here all day.wanna go out and play.can I climb a mountain tomorrow?can I lend and not borrow?I want a horse so bad! Ive lost my mind and gone mad . the sun doesnt burn.it only stings.Is it better to die?and lie in heaven floating in the sky, or in a dream.let me shift my fist in your face.the rain has sifted, now theres no open space.dont got courage im a coward.nothing anyone says will make me stronger.well?maybe his words.for sure they wont hurt.but im hopeless,everyone knows it.these things theyre in my head.can I leave and go to bed?
believing doesnt matter.people want and want and yet they never flatter.can I abandon those early years?can I just run away and hide from those fears?I wanna sail the sea.I dont wanna go home.take a look at my face are you impressed or ashamed.thats ok I dont care anymore.once I get to the end those tears will descend.dont play games.dont want friends.besides they dont help,theyll never feel what ive felt.can they leave me alone and go to hell.will I ever change?wait! who gives a crap ill just stay the same.I forgot whats forgotten.I lied! there goes another burden.can I change my clothes?lets stop and go.reality has been lost.now noyone knows what they really got.,my efforts arent worth it.I still have questions unanswered.will tomorrow be a good day?cuz im tired of crying.I hope he'll stay forever with me,everyday.life can be lost wit the slamming of a door. so stop creating bore,go out live life,bring ur ship ashore.when it comes to life dont be blind.keep ur mind in shape find wat u may find.If u fall get up right away.dont fool urself.dont even hide ur ways.im still here I aint goin nowhere.so ill stay for awhile and ride the ride.till my head explodes and its time 4 goodbye.

*please everyone rate my poem-this one is special to me and i wanna hear ur opinions-thanks anyway-gl*