I wonder

I wonder if you thought about the people that are crying at your funeral right now as you swallowed the pills and with alcohol washed them down

I wonder if you thought about your poor mum visiting you again, not wanting to let you leave this world although you're already gone

I wonder if while you sat there desperate and feeling so sh*t, I do wonder if you realised that that was it

I wonder if as this world began to blur and your body sank did you think of what was about to occur, and did you regret it?

I wonder if when you were in the hospital with people fighting for your life, did you join the fight or did you run to darkness, away from the light

I don't think you would realise the effect that your death has had, I don't think you would realise how many people your death has made sad

And I do wonder if you had the chance would you change your death, would you maybe think about the rest, and maybe phone someone and let it out, phone a friend or lover and tell them what you were so down about.

I'm really not sure you'd want them to go through this pain, and because of that I wonder, if you could go back, would you commit suicide again?