I am the reason I cut

Just laying here,
Laying now,
Feel the blood pour out my arm.
Every drop I spill,
Every drop I loose,
Makes my pain get less,
And my tears get more.
I hate doing this,
I hate feeling this,
I hate my life,
I hate cutting, bleeding, crying,
I cant stop.

The blood it drips,
Blade turns from silver to red,
It helps.

My life doesn't matter,
My heartache invisible,
No-one cares I cut.

Every drop I spill
Reminds me I still live.
Every drop I loose
Reminds me I am in control.
Every time I cut
Gives me power,
Takes away my pain,
Takes away my sadness,
Takes away my inside feelings.
Every time I bleed
Nothing else matters.
All the blood I loose wont be missed.
I wont be missed.
What is the point...
I don't know why I live.

When I cry I cut,
When I'm sad I cut,
When I'm angry I cut,
When I'm lost I cut,
When I'm frightened I cut,
I cant stop.

This is my habit,
This is my addiction -
My self inflicted pain.

Cuts they heal,
I make more.
Scars they fade,
I make more.
Pain I loose,
I make more.
My life I'm loosing -
I cant get it back.
I cant stop.

I deserve all this,
The tears my punishment,
The pain my cost,
The cutting my sentence,
The dying my end.

I cant stop.
I cant be who I used to be.
I have changed.
I cant smile.
I cant be happy.
I deserve everything I get.

I blame myself,

I am the real reason I cut.

sorry its not that great :S let me no what ya think anyway.