that is a good poem.I like the way it came out.

I think the form could be more clearly defined to make it an easier piece to read, but the piece itself is very entertaining.

Liked it plenty.

B

wow. that first line got me hooked! and the.. 'let me drink from your lips'.. my word. i'm amazed!! please, keep writing!!! check out a few of mine! lol awesome awesome job. continue the greatness of your writing!

I agree with Bret, it could be made easier to read, but the poem in itself was very nice. I loved some of the wording you used, for example " see your name written, images in the dew" was beautiful!
Dorotea

I agree with bret and dorotea,
But this poem is simply AMAZING!
I'm dying to see more of your work.

Keep on writing and allways believe.
</3Erin

A very descriptive piece that just got more interesting as I kept reading i t through. As sadi by others before though it was difficult to follow in places, but only because of the layout.

Keep Writing
Nici

i really liked the start of the poem but the flow wasn't there after keep on posting your poems

This was really powerful I thought on your first time out I see you speak from the heart and soul that is very well done. Keep up the good work and I will be waiting for your next poem. Take care.

Beautifully written.

"let me drink from your lips.."

I love it. Amazing. :)

great work.. I liked the poem and the flow only one line I thought slowed down the poems pace...Im your rock...your my soft spot...our foundation built on God's strength... but the poem overall is great... very Hafizian..

good job.. love it...
amanda

This is wonderfully written. You need to write more!