The Price for the Majestic Elite

Trickles of stifling sweat breach your pores...
...Streaming down in warm rivulets.
Head bent to torn fists, you weep over the dead body lying at your feet.
Still, even now, as the broken body lays ever-still upon the reddened earth, you pray...pray for deliverance of your vile nature...asking God to forgive you of your sins...

...Then in a wisp of light an angel appears and answers your plea for mercy and grace. No one else seems to matter as you get what you asked for...God's unfailing love and duty...
But never you thought to forget the theme of repentance...for when the angel left, you turned back to your "wicked" ways.

...The time comes where another broken body lies so still at your feet...by your evil hands...and then a scripture comes into your mind...something about if your tongue causes you hindrance from walking the path of the Lord, then cut it off, th same as with your hands and eyes...

...So you tell God in a quick prayer that you will do what is required...
So now...you have no hands to murder with...

But the fact is...in humanity...
...No matter when we try our hardest to "fix ourselves"...another impurity will surface on our demurred skin...and there is no way to maintain the stability of what God's love requires for his own delight...

Cut off your hands...Gouge out your eyes...Walk on pegs and bleed your heart...but you can never clear your Temple of your soul...for to do so would be to live in eternal hell...

So...I kill myself, if only to follow God's wish...Fate in heaven is not for me...for on earth...there's no guarantee that I can remain pure enough for his Majestic Elite.