I cannot really give critique for this one, because I do not know even one word of French. Still, the French words seemed to fit in nicely, and gave this poem a sort of 'royal' look to it. Very nice job on that. As for the English, it was very original. I loved the line, "Whisks of mint from her lips.." Nice job, this poem portrays a lot of different feelings, and they were well woven together.
Dorotea