Feelings Hidden

Life isn't getting easier the longer I go
The more I learn it seems the less I know

Sometimes things just get so out of hand
Its hard when someone pushes you down to get back up and stand

I think about everything then feel sorry for myself
Its hard to explain my feelings to you because you cant feel what I felt

I guess it because the feelings I hide is why I cut my wrist
Because I can't confront my feelings to any of this

I don't anyone to worry about me honestly
Because the only one who can help me is me

But really do you know how it feels to hate yourself
And know your sick and need some help

Or what it feels like to cry yourself to sleep at night
Not knowing if everything is gonna be alright

I don't even know what guys think when they talk to me
Do they think I'm that easy what do they see?

I think thats what brings down my self esteem
It hurts me so bad it makes me wanna scream

But I guess everyone thinks of me that low
Maybe its because my true self I don't really show

Its just horrible...I mean my world
Why do you all look at me like I'm a little girl

I know what is going on and what you say about me
I don't get why you all can't let me be

I make mistakes I'm aware of that
They're things I wish I could take back

The worst feeling is when you hear your best friend talking about you
If she thinks your a bad person does everyone else too?

I try so hard to make everyone proud
But I guess I'm a failure and let everyone down

I want to tell everyone how I really feel
But I'm afraid they won't take me real

So until then I guess my feelings I will hide
And I will be the only by my side