Im Here

Dear Jess

these are a few words i have written
my expression of what Ive wanted to say
i couldn't think of a better way
than through my heart and soul
which is my poetry

you are not alone in this world
no matter how lonely you feel
no one can ever take me away from you
please listen to me, i want you to hear this

we both have a battle to fight
secrets we keep hidden
a face an act so we don't get hurt
but being fake wont help either of us win our war

you cant talk to me
but you have to understand I'm trying
i have a past i have memories
most of which i cant stand

i am not an open book
unless you see my scars
but i have hidden them from everyone
so no own truly knows how i feel

i sit in tears night after night
knowing the only thing stopping you
could be broken so easily
that once the pain takes over
it is very hard to forget
i have faith in you
i know that you are strong
i know that you can make it
Ive lost one of my best friends before
don't make me say goodbye to another

i don't really know how to persuade you
how to make you believe I'm telling the truth
you mean so much to me
i hate hearing how much you hurt

Ive hit my own boiling point
Ive broken down Ive cracked my shell
my defenses are down and I'm showing weakness
i don't know how much more of this i can take

I'm on the edge of a cliff
held up by a twig and your hand holding me
you've pulled me to safety before
nows its my turn to save you

I'm never going to let the branch break
you will not plummet to your death
I'm here for you Jess
all you have to do is let me help

I'm opening up slowly
I'm still trying to figure out whats real
Ive lost myself i need help to find me
but i know i have to evaluate myself first

you are such a great friend to me
you don't think IL understand
but Jess you don't know everything I'm hiding
we have much more in common than you see

if you jump so will i
if you slit then IL push my blade deeper
if you pop pills i will double the amount i take
but nothing will ever be the same if i lose you

i love you to death
if thats what it comes to let it be
i cant continue fighting without you
i love you so much Jess
i just hope you know that from reading this

© Copyright J.A.