R.I.P

I really never meant to let you down
living such a pathetic life of mine
My hearts decieted and is playing games with me
Setting me in a trance...wasting your time

You told me to never start
all the arrogant habits you cannot erase
But I never listened to what you said
I live my life...hiding the pain on my face.

I never knew why you stuck around
after I continued to fail you even more
You called me every second to make sure I was okay
and after no answer you were at my front door.

Its so strange how I've been cutting for two years
and yet I never seem to succeed
Now I have completely pissed you off
and your hatred comes so hard to redeem.

Then again I never care what others say
as I slice my wrist and search for a vein
You become so angry when you look at the scars
but I cant seem to help when I laugh at the pain

You think Im faking and I'll stop real soon
but do you hear the voices inside my head
Do you hear them singing to me...
lullabies of magic to just be dead!

So if you don't mind... just let me go...
so that I can die....deceased....
I never wanted to hurt you or anyone else...
I just wanted for you to let me rest in peace!