Now this is who i am

No longer am i what you want to see
this is now who i am
no longer will i force you these lies to believe
now you perfectly can understand

now this is me....

i act like i don't care
but really inside i take it at heart
i take out this knife when no ones here
a line on my arm for a start

but then it turns into something else
something so deep and cold
the razor in my skin is all thats felt
theres no way it can be controlled

i push it inside my skin
i cut rite by my veins
i make sure that it goes in
to release all my unwanted pain

when i get home i put on bracelets to hide
all the marks and scars
nothing can help whats depressed inside
and who you truly are

i hide all my tears in the rain
no one can tell when I'm crying
i pressure myself to hold in the pain
before i feel like dying

i hide all thees lies behind my eyes
i hold all them to my death
you'll all find out when i die
everything i haven't yet confessed

in this casket i believe is my home
where i truly belong
in this box all alone
with others who couldn't stay strong

at night i dream of only one thing
its of the day i will die
and how i would do just anything
to not be alive

inside I'm nothing but broken
I'm torn I'm nothing
i want a new door to open
to death thats what I'm wanting

Ive cut with the blade
since i was eleven
for that long i waited for life to fade
i wanted to got o heaven

i longed to lie inside the bed
of loneliness and death
living here is what i dread
nothing i can confess

so now you all no some what of who i am
and you probably don't no the half
but you all need to understand
that I'm not going to come back

tonight is the last of what your going to see
of what your going to no
this is nothing but me
death is what I'm for

so as you see me lying on the floor
all covered in my own blood
just because i couldn't take anymore
i lie here in my own fluid

with my arm sliced into something new
with a picture of a knife
this is what i used
this is what ended my life

my everything now is gone
but i really had nothing
i couldn't stand strong
i couldn't do it for anything

now you all must no who i am
Ive been waiting for this day
my death has already been demanded
can you now see i was never okay?

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