Today I got something in the mail

by Annabelle   Jun 22, 2005


Dark Humor Ahoy!

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Today in the mailbox there was something for me
The mailman delivered it sometime after three

It was an exciting moment finding it there
Hidden behind coupons and bills of despair.

Wrapped in an envelope decorated in ink that was green
I was surprised how many stamps were on it - In my opinion it was quite lean

There was no return address
Which caused quite a stress
So I hesitated a moment I honestly must confess

Today in this world mail isn't quite safe
With anthrax and other things that make your skin chafe

I thought of the precautions that I might have to take
And even considered forgetting it for cookies I could bake

Though I was worried with the threats that could be inside
My curiosity was so strong if I didn't open it I thought I might die

I bravely put on rubber gloves from the kitchen sink
And took a few sniffs of the envelop just in case there was a stink

When I didn't pass out I proceeded to open
The voice in my head convinced there should be some sort of token

To my surprise and much despair
There was nothing, I say nothing in that envelope there

No letter with words from a relative from a far
No invisible leprechaun there so I could wish for a car

The package was empty and it left me in a daze
And even more so when I started seeing a sort of yellow haze

There were red spots on my wall, on my ceiling, and on my skin
And I cursed my curiosity for wanting to open the damn thing then

Just because I couldn't see it doesn't mean it wasn't there
And I must admit, not seeing the bio-chemical certainly isn't very fair.

It'll be a while until anyone notices I'm gone
The only time my neighbor visits is when I make homemade flan.
This of course is reason for me to say "humph"
I only make flan on the first of the month

Today in the mailbox there was something for me
The mailman delivered it sometime after three

I proceeded to open it and around three forty five
I'd come to the conclusion that because of it I had died.

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Latest Comments

  • 19 years ago

    by Vegetable

    Wow very ironic that the only person who ever thinks of anthrax, bichemical poisioning ect. is the one who dies of it!

  • 19 years ago

    by Amba

    Ohh thats sacry, now im scared to open my mail lol
    5/5 tho
    xox Bam