Dad: By Hating You I'm Protecting Myself

By hating you, I'm protecting myself
Your killing my love for you Can't you see I hate to see you like this By telling you I gave you I'm stopping myself from hurting.

Locked in your facade of self pity
You can't see the real outside
Lost in the shadows of your lies
Your losing your grip
Your falling down with no way up.

Behind a bottled mark is a face
The face of a man
I used to love I really did dad
But now your losing it
Walking a road you can't escape from.

Instead of caring about your kids
You'd rather wallow and cry
You've got kids to protect
We need to feel like we've got a dad
Can you act like one?

A bottle of cider a can of lager
Is that what you are?
A wreck of a man a pathetic drunk
You got no job you got no home
What are you now?

Anger is taking over you your losing
Your battling yourself
Not giving a damn about anything else
Going from thing to thing
Destroying yourself and everyones respect for you.

What have you got to live for? you ask yourself Well maybe your five kids Or are we all just ghosts in your mind Past present or future We're always going to be here

You found out drugs don't make you feel better
25 years is hard to drop
But you kicked drugs out of the door
Why can booze kill you like this?
Its keeping you from facing reality.

*note* this is actually 100% real. my dad was on drugs and have up a few months ago. but he is now drinkin alcohol so much and blaming it on relationship problems. hes forgetting about his kids. but the thing that hurts me the most is that so i don't get hurt in the future i have to pretend that i have him.

© Mark Coates 2005