Did you know that you were one of the first people to comment on one of my poems?....yeah....

Anyway...this piece has potential....though the idea is sound...i think you could work on the manner in which it's put across, as it reads a little flatly right now.

One thing you could do is infer all the main points of the poem without actually saying them out bluntly.

happy posting.

that was really great, all your work is wonderful, hope you keep it coming, on my faves list u r.

Đ_Đe٧įŀ.