A Star

by Lydie   Jul 1, 2005


I gaze up at a star,
As I sit on the beach,
A star to make my wish upon,
A star I'll never reach,

A star so far away,
So far, but not out of site,
But I can only ever see this star,
Only ever at night,

A star so pretty,
A star so bright,
I wish I may,
I wish I might,

A childhood memory,
As I gaze up at the sky,
On such a sandy beach,
The beach on why I ly,

So this tiny star,
So far away,
A tiny dot,
Made me feel better today,

It took me out of this world,
And let me float independantly,
And now, I look at the star,
And all my troubles are free.

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Latest Comments

  • 19 years ago

    by Lydia O

    This was a delightful poem that evoked a lot of different emotions' I liked the relationship you drew betweeen the beach and the star gazing. This created a pleasingly vivid contrast between nature's terrestrial beauty and celestial beauty. I also liked the way you deftly wove the reminiscence of childhood into the poem.

    I hope you will not be offended by a bit of honest, constructive criticism. This poem as well as your other that I have read contain a few technical errors. Small mistakes in grammar or spelling tend to disproportionately distract the reader of an otherwise fine poem.

    I believe you are a very talented writer and I thank you for sharing your work here.

    All the best to you. ---Lydia O.

  • 19 years ago

    by ♥•oOo Nikki oOo•♥©

    Aww I Like It, Its Something Not Many People Think About, It Was Beautiful And I Enjoyed My Read 5.0! xoxo-Nikki-xoxo

  • 19 years ago

    by Victoria

    wow thats so excellent

  • 19 years ago

    by Chris

    hrm.... it was good. i like it. there's nothing like the beach and stars to make youre worries go away.

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