If Only You Knew

If only you knew,
How you hurt me so,
When you up and left,
And I didn't want you to go.

Things felt so right,
Like you were my one,
But now all that's over,
Because it had to be done.

You were so nice at first,
And I loved you so much,
But that physical thing,
Was no longer a touch.

You became violent,
Like you didn't even care,
Then you said it was my fault,
And didn't want me there.

I said I would leave,
So you promised to change,
You gave me your word,
But you couldn't arrange.

So, you did change,
But only for a week,
Then you started up again,
And called me a freak.

You beat me again,
And threatened my life,
So you promised again,
And asked me to be your wife.

Stupidly I took you back,
Thinking you meant it this time,
Not realizing what I'd done,
Doing my heart a crime.

You did it again,
The same thing began,
But I thought 'He loves me',
Like you were my man.

So the kisses became bruises,
And the sweet words became lies,
But I was too weak to do anything,
So all I could do is cry.

So I made that mistake,
Of giving you your way,
But now I'm connected to you,
And always it will stay.

I can't kill that connection,
Because It's not something I can do,
Now I'm being forced,
To get closer to you.

But even after all that,
And breaking my heart made of glass,
I realize that though we are connected,
I still hate your stupid ass.