Insecurities

You know, I look at you and I realize,
that things just aren't the same.
The feelings, the touch the emotions,
They've all become so 'tame'.

I think it's me thats doing this,
I think it's me thats died.
But I can't help but feel empty,
God knows I've really tried.

I really do love you,
maybe thats why it burns.
I just feel like your not 'here',
for another, your heart yearns.

I know you say your over her,
I know you say she's gone.
I know you say it's me you want,
I know you say I'm wrong.

but the thing is, I don't FEEL wrong,
I don't FEEL like I'm the one.
I don't feel like when you hold me,
emotions, depth... nothing, none.

I think your thinking of someone else,
I think you don't care.
I really can't blame you either,
I'm never really fair.

I'm not very attractive,
I'm not very kind.
I'm not very intellegent,
not enough for your mind.

you are beautiful, smart and wonderful,
in every single way.
I can't help but feel insecure,
every single day.

Thats why I want rid of you,
because inside I'm ripping apart.
every part of me yearns to be loved by you,
And I'll never believe your heart.

But, it's MY mind thats the problem,
It's MY mind thats f*cked.
It's my body thats ugly,
I'm sorry you even looked.

I'm sorry I held you to me,
I'm sorry I can't let go.
But your the best thing that ever happened,
This, you need to know.

All I know is if I keep you,
I'll kill myself inside.
I'll kill any kind of friendship we could have,
if this I continue to hide.

You must have never felt inadequate,
belittled or insecure.
You don't even know the tears I cry,
every time you walk out the door.

You don't know how many times I have hurt myself,
mentally, physically... the pain.
Just to know some real feeling,
Just to give it a name.

It's time to let go of you,
let you find your dove.
Let you live your life,
and find your forever love....

Please remember that I will always love you....

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