When I was a child
I thought life was great
I never felt anger
nor this rancid hate
I saw life as a door
that would lead to more fun
never did I imagine that I'd be such a monster
when my childhood was done
I remember the times
I told others that I hate them
But I was only a child
the next day we'd be best friends again
but now its so different
I'm not at all surprised
when I think about the bad times in my life
all the people that told me lies
they said I was bound for greatness
never have a day of despair
but now that I'm a adult
none of them liars are there
are they afraid to see me
or do they just fear to be wrong
i guess that have no answers for me
cause they lied all along
they knew I was a foolish kid
who knew nothing about his world
knew nothing about school and life
nothing about love and girls
I was nothing but a shadow
that followed the other kids
Look where that has lead me
stuck dealing with unimaginable to s***
Sometimes I don't feel human
just a monster under this skin
sometimes I wonder when this pain began
wondering will it ever end
When did it start
why did it in the first place
did I do something terrible to someone
or is just what they call "fate"
The so called future
thats written in stone
If thats the case than I want that thing
because my fate is me being all alone
If fate is decided among us all
then when do we try?
If theres nothing we can do to fork the future
why don't we sit and wait to die.
not being in control of your life
is "the" fear among fears
its like not being in control your feelings
realizing you've been a puppet all these years
look at your bare shoulder
and see the horrid string
you're a puppet and you know it
people can make you do anything
yeah thats how I feel
I'm being controlled night and day
but what they can't control is what I think
and for damn sure, not what I say.
