Unnecessarry Pain

Unnecessary Pain

I can't do this anymore
I am living a lie
I'm so lost without you
I am ready to die

I can not stand your silence
I need to hear your voice
But then I realize it's all my fault
I'm the one that made the choice

56 days ago
I told you to go away
But I do regret my thoughts
And I long for your touch today

It's not the first time I've done this
I did it twice before
But you will not take me back
My chances are gone, no more

I wish I could have seen it sooner
The love I feel for you
I let you slip away from me
And yet I never knew

I hurt you to many times
In the past three years
Now all I am left with
Is to wallow in my tears

I am sorry for the hurt I caused
For all the unnecessary pain
None of my choices were worth it
Nothing did I gain

I miss you more than ever
I miss your tender care
But now I am here without you
And with that I am bare

I can not go on like this
Each day just brings more pain
Every minute without you gets harder
It's driving me insane

I think about your smile
When it would make my day
But now I never see it
And I don't know what to say

How could I do this
I don't understand why
What could possess me to cause
The things that make me cry

I have tried so hard to forget
All the memories that we made
But it just makes them so much stronger
They will never fade

So I stare here at our pictures
Wondering what you think
And I realize that you hate me
It makes my heart just sink

It took me so long to see
What I put you through
I wish I could apologize
For all the things I do

But I am left behind without a trace
You will never hear me out
Its all my fault, the choices I've made
And I am left to live my life with doubt

I just want you to know one thing
That I am sorry for all that's been
I promise I will love you forever
I don't have to pretend

I have no where else to go
I have no more dreams or goals
Because now that I am without you
It has taken away my soul