Blood-stained apology

I can't do this no more
I don't know what my reason of living is for
My family hates me because I'm my own person
They'd rather have a tea party, while I'd take the cigarette and cursing

I have scars that will never go away
I have thoughts that let me know nothing will be OK
They have words that will tear my heart apart
They have ways that ruined me from the start

I hurt myself on a regular basis
I do it because i just can't take this
I don't want to leave, i just need to take away this pain
It's better than holding it in until i go insane

I want to be here because yous don't
I will never change my ways, i won't
Yous can push me away or even throw me down
I'm not going anywhere, I'm always going to be around

I am sorry though for calling you family
I am sorry that yous won't ever get love from me
there's one thing that you'll get out of me
a scar for all of yous, it's my blood-stained apology