Witherd Rose

"Waking up to scents,
Of dead roses in the air.
Can’t stay where i am suppose to belong,
In the shadows, but there is no where else I have left to go.
The distance I can no longer see,
A reminiscence I can bare no longer ..and search out for you.
Scabbed angels at my feet."

^^^^^ Amazing stanza. I get what you mean, and understand perfectly. I can relate, and the stanza just captures me. As if I am you, or as if I was the person, feeling those heavy emotions.

"Ages passing and I feel already withered.
Waking up hoping I could go back now, but time denies me.
I can hear you through passing whispers,
Are you even there to hear my screams?
Thought to many times you would come back for me,
Save me from the demons living off me."

^^^ Amazing yet again. So powerful. I like what you where getting at, your mistakes we've made, wishing we could all go back. Least that's what I am getting from that stanza.

"Listen to my crushed soul weep as my soul seems to decrease,
Deeper and deeper,
without age everything decays."

^^^ THOSE LINES- Fantastic! Raw, clever, wonderful wording, and structure. It stands strong, and sticks out. I think it was wonderful. And guy wrenching.

"Black velvet dreams,
And your words I have long forgotten, along with the memories.
This rose dies. "

^^^ What a perfect way to end a great poem. I don't know what but the few words that are written, end this poem incerdiably well, it just ends it and fills in any blanks or dumb founded spots you might have gotten from the rest of the poem, if someone read it and didn't get what you meant. A fine piece of art you have here.

Wow, this is amazingly sad. I loved it.

Roses have always been one of the few thing i thought of as beautful and to me symbolized the beauty in the world and i think withered roses is the perfect thing to show as this world and it was a wonderful poem i love it the flow, the words, and the feeling in it

Was this seriously your first poem? As many as you've had since then, you may never see this comment, but I LOVED it! 5/5!
PV

wow your words are so beautiful, i love black roses its my thing but this is beautiful , anyone who writes about roses is a good person lol... thank u for ur comment and ill consider writing more, im glad im on ur favorites and ill always comment back for comments...this was truly beautiful tho...
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