Wall of Great Big Lies

I just feel like I want to die,
Because there’s no tears left to cry.

I have taken in so much pain,
That anymore I cannot gain.

Dark thoughts start circling in my head,
Telling me I really deserve to be dead.

Yet still I cannot cry,
Because my lives a great big lie.

I have these scars up an down my arm,
But I cannot show anyone my self-harm.

I feel like nobody wants me around,
And I just feel like I should be buried underground.

I know I have been through a lot of shit,
But my pain does not just end with it.

I have tried so hard to become happy,
Yet I’m still here drowning in my own misery.

I just need someone to actually be there,
To say they love me and tell me they care.

But I’m still here, lonely as can be,
These words inside tell you about the real me.

I wish I could show everyone who I am,
But deep down inside I don’t know if I can.

So here I’ll stay in this full disguise
Trapped behind this wall of great big lies.

~Madison Leigh~ July 7th 2005