My Sucidal Letter

The poem to my one true love..the one who ended my life.Long, i know. but please read..maybe you'll understand.

Kevin-

my suicidal letter to you will be absolutely crazy. no matter where i ever went, i craved to be your baby. weather or not you felt the same, it didn't bother me. i still wanted to be with you, so you'd fall in love with me.no matter what you ever said, i never would give up. you told me no matter what i did, it'd never be enough. and even though i cried so hard, hearing you say those things..i still was madly in love with you, missing you in my dreams.days went by and i never ate, thinking that it'd help. making me more perfect, so you would see as well. that i loved you Kevin, i loved you so, why couldn't you just know? you thought that the cuts and bruises, were nothing but a show. even still, i split my veins. crying while replaying your name. and nothing would have stopped me, but you standing in the rain. you knew that was my dream, to see you caring too. just for me to see, that i meant something to you. but somehow through all the pain, i even managed to laugh. laughing just because i realized the nothing that we had. and then i finally found someone new. a guy who loved me too.for some reason, i never saw the pain he could put me through. i really thought i loved him, Kevin, just as much as you. but awake during those late nights, all i could think about was you. so i had to sacrifice my love, the new one for this boy. love would mean nothing without the simple joy. so confiding this, in a note, i cried while holding the blade. not yet piercing it through my skin, but staring at past scars i made. while tracing through the crusted blood, i somehow saw your face. you , the reason for all this pain, could never be replaced. and now as i leave this note tonight, my memories seem to fade, i hope you realize the lives you cost, the ones you could have saved.. as i dig my veins into this blade.

i give up.