the flow kinda put me off a bit but it was a good poem...

better luck next time :)

good job...i didnt like this one as much as the other one because the flow was a bit rough here but other then that good job....luv yas mwah

-kayla-

I like the rhyme. Good work.

It seems to end a bit prematurely, I think it could be expanded on a bit more. I like how you could change the rhythm and stanza length and still keep the flow of this going. I think the first stanza is the best, it sounds very poetic and the rhyming fits very nicely.