Birth
by David Wallace Aug 3, 2005
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Impregnated with life, a little clone of ones self put into something so beautiful and pure.Embedded with innocence and wholesomeness.Born without sin either know the birth-givers choice may have been misguided or a foolish act of love or lust lost on someone not Worthy to be part of as beautiful as using the x and y chromosomes given from above by our heavenly farther to expand and make the human race more articulate and exceptional above the rest.Sweat dripping down mamma's edifice breathing in and out in a repetitious state to ease the pain of the territory that comes with the territory that comes with the birth of a beautiful baby boy or girl.Coming through the birth canal the head emerges equipped with all 10 fingers and toes, heartbeat decreases and a smile sets in like a bright sunset after the darkness. Behold your child a beautiful work of art no matter the way he or she may have been conceived.Tears from the baby's eyes slowly deteriorate as the being's soft head lays across mamma's bosom becoming one 4 ever. |
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Latest Comments
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17 years ago
Nice poem...... It didn't really flow well and it isn't really the type of poem I enjoy reading...... But there was some very good use of words in there. 4/5 Good job.
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17 years ago
Sorry to say that I am not impressed.
"bright sunset after the darkness"
I liked that. This poem just lacked structure and flow. It was freeverse, I understand. Yet it was like this was written as a narrator, not a poem. It gave me no emotion.
And I must comment on your comment, Man of Your Dreams. That poem was about me. How is that not personal? It explains anticipation, worry, loneliness.
Just work on your flow. It seems as if you have a wall surrounding YOUR feelings. You just write about topics, not things you experience. -
17 years ago
by Rachel RTVW
Nice job on this. Very unique. I do have a suggestion. Seperate the poem into stanzas, it will make it flow better and will be easier to read. Your word choice here is good and so is the imagery!
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17 years ago
by Laura
Nice i like it then again I like a lot of em' lol
Laura -
19 years ago
by Betty Boop
Really like it, too...... Goin to read more..
