Special friendship

All along this friendship,
I've truly cared for you,
But I doubt it's pure friend's care,
This feeling I have for you.

I felt sad and depressed,
In times that you ignore,
But when you are so nice to me,
I wish you'd give some more.

When you talk about some other girl,
I want to yell and scream,
I felt like it's a nightmare,
That could've been a lovely dream.

To envy and be jealous,
That right I do not have,
I should be happy for you,
Because we are only friends.

At night when the moon is full,
In my lonely bed I lay,
I dream of us together,
I hope there'll come a day.

But then I'd stop to think,
Of our past and present state,
True friendship develops into love,
Will that be our fate?

I'm only your true bestfriend,
That's what you think of me,
I keep all your secrets,
The trusted "sister" is me.

You stare with twinkly eyes,
Curiosity or just nothing,
While I have butterflies in my stomach,
To think none of it, I should.

I enjoy your comfy company,
The words you said that care,
But to tell you how I feel for you,
That I wouldn't dare.

Because maybe you'd avoid me,
Walk away if I get near,
Refuse to talk and be with me,
That's my greatest fear.

You're always there for me,
Both when I'm down and up,
The friendship we promised forever,
I hope it will not stop.