My BreakDown

I talked to you today
i thought it would be good
for me and you
but it turned the other way
the conversation was great
but it got me thinking
of old times
i looked over somethings
i still had saved
one conversation of ours
that meant a lot to me
so many things were said
and i missed them so
i started to cry
whole hearted crying
i couldn't take it
i went to my room
still crying my eyes out
i dug through my drawer
found my trusty old blade
then found a cigarette
i lit the cigg
and held the blade
my hands were shaking
with each drag i took
my head hurt
i became light headed
i began slashing my skin
in places you wouldn't see
on my hip
right below my pant line on my back
i began saying things
of how i missed you
crying so loud
it hurt so bad
but felt so good
to be using the knife
once again
i know you hate when
i smoke a cigarette
i felt both happy
and guilty
god how i miss you
i couldn't stop thinking
about your sweet face
and things you have said
i cant even count
how many cuts i made
some are small
some big
they overlap
and some are neat in rows
many are straight
and few are jagged
this was my breakdown
all because of you

please vote and comment i know its horrible but its wat happened and how i felt i hvae been freaking out ever since yesterday when it happened