Nicely done...

"You smiled towards my heart
But I could see your hate
Probably because it's been long
We've waited until late"

I'm not sure, but it might be better as something like...
"Probably because it's been so long
We've waited until too late"

It just seems there's a little missing in those two lines...but, anyways, good form/phrasing...I like it.

xxx

OMG, I know I nearly always say this that your newest ones are just getting better but man this rocked!

I loved this stanza..
"But my heart was yanked
Because you looked back
I lied with a full smile
While my heart grew a crack"

and I agree with the person above me you should change that stanza because it was hardish to read...

Wow I also loved this stanza "You've held me back
But I've done the same
Now our love is down
To the flickering flame" last line was the blooming best!!!!!!

I understood your poem well, let me know when ya got a new one I'd love to see how you improve next time lol :D

-xo-lisa

Nice piece. I really liked this line: "I lied with a full smile While my heart grew a crack" It's a shame how things go like that for people, but it makes for good poetry and you proove that point well.

XxX))Eclipse((XxX

I loved the poem especially the fifth stanza. i dont mean to seem fussy but you missed out a space on the third line of that stanza. just thought ud want to know.
i also really liked the end of the poem. the flickering flame was great.

Great job. Just a suggestion, but in the 1st line of the 4th stanza, instead of 'My heart was yanked' I think if you varied your vocab and used something like 'My soul was yanked' it would get reader's attention a lot better, but if you're touchy about your poetry like I am (*blush*) then I can understand why. Very good job though -- there's a lot of feeling put into it. I hope to read some more of your poetry.
-Kate
(4)

Wow this was another totally amazing poem! hehe =) i luffed it!
keep up the gr8 work...this poem rox =) lol! 5/5!
elizabeth

Amazing.. i love it.. nice strong ending.. the last stanza is priceless.. keep it up..

Another 5! I like your way with words, they have such a deep meaning.

Wow amazing poem....very well written....rough in a few spots but other then that great job....5/5 thanks for the comment on my poem....it means a lot!!! keep up the great work....luv yas mwah

-kayla-