Once Again

Once again I return to the arms of my journal
in which lay my soul, mind and heart eternal.

Between the lines on these pages I have my sanctuary
and in between these words my hopes can not vary.

But with slow recognition I am forced to look at my retreat,
what could have burnt me, what force has such heat.

So I look back, just a few weeks past.
I don’t believe it, how did they go by so fast.

And there I see it what has caused me this pain.
We were to be just friends, how could I be so vain.

There was a chance there for something more,
but as I look at it, replay it, my heart grows sore.

My mind wilts at such a chance lost.
My soul, now cold, covered with frost.

But I have been here before,
same girl, always giving her one more

So I think, more than likely, I will see her again
and maybe next time I will end with a win

But as my pen stops writing I just add it to her file
and return to my embracing, self-loathing exile.