My Mistake

My body shakes as I walk through the door.
A white cold room
with baby pictures on the wall.
Sitting in the waiting room
my mind begins to wonder.
The nurse calls out my name
I began to feel sick.
She takes down my information
Questions if if I'm sure.
Silence escapes my mouth.
Thinking of the pain I will endure.
The nurse explains the procedure
and how long it will take.
knowing my baby won't be there
When it's time for me to wake.
The tears began to flow
This is something I can't do.
Stopping the life of my child so innocent and new.
I go along with the sin
Only God knows of the pain I hold within.
My breath gets heavy body starts to shake.
The doctor says 2 minutes is all it will take.
I lay back on the bed and the anesthesia puts me in a zone.
Heart crushed because
I'm killing my own.
I feel myself drowning in sorrow not wanting to go on.
Next thing I know it was to late my baby was gone.
As I awake I feel the nurse place me in a chair.
Regretting what I've done
It was so unfair.
Sitting in the Recovery Room
I begin to clench in my seat.
Feeling nothing but emptiness
I touch my belly.
Hoping to feel it move inside me
I could hear my baby screaming asking me why?
Letting me hear every tear it sheds.
If only I could've said no
When the nurse asked before.
My baby would be here.
Smiling while I held her near.
But now all I have is the reminder of the never ending crying inside my mind.
I will never forget the pain I felt When I realized you were taken away.
It stays on my mind everyday, second,minute,and hour of the day.
As I ask God to forgive me for the sin I could've delayed.
But now all I could do is get on my knees and pray for my mistake.