From a girl who dreams of dying

You can't tell me how to act.
You can't say you know what is going on.
Because you would not be talking to me, you would be long gone.
Because all memories are filled with grieve and agony.

All those memories of people laughing, people telling me I am wrong,
and of people that are now long gone.
They did not understand , so they ran away to their well known minds and hid.
All their lies can't hide them from the truth, that they know so well.

You can not tell me that it is ok, while putting me to the back of your mind.
All your lies mixed with what little truth you know sound so sweet that it makes me wish they were true.
But I know I can't live in your lies.

Everything is so confusing.
There is no place for me.
So I crouch on the cold ground while holding my head in my hands.
I weep in silence. So much that most of my hopes are wasted away in my tears.
I clasp my ears, trying to keep the piercing noise of silence out.

You can't tell me not to give up all hope.
When all my hope was lost long ago.
There isn't no help for the ones not willing to help themselves.
So leave me alone and go away.
For I am not seeking your guidance.

To think once I was happy and gay.
I would want to play out in the sunshine and jump in puddles in the rain.
It's amazing how one so optimistic can become so dark and cold.
Now my laugh is sinister and eyes are filled with tears. It seems now like my days are bleak and full or grieve.

You can't tell me this is just a phase.
For surely it is not.
You know how they say smoking and drinking is an addiction.
Well my pain is my addiction.

I know it's hard for you to accept me.
So don't try, because all you know is lies.
But if you want to know the truth.
It is plain to see it is scarred upon me.
Form a girl who dreams of dying.