Tomorrow will be

I won't take time venting my problems anymore
I won't shed a tear either, no matter what for
I don't know what i want in life
A real, happy smile or a bloody old knife...
I sit a lot and think about life when I'm older
I would love to be the things i want, but my life is getting colder
Maybe i shouldn't even be here?
Maybe I am actually my only fear
I think a lot of times i do scare myself
My mind is crazy, it's hard explain or tell
first of all this house is not a home
Maybe I'm better off alone?
Friends have already been to heaven
But I'm afraid I'll leave early and they won't let me get in
I hate when I'm like this...undecided
It's a battle with myself with these feelings with i hide it
I don't want to talk to anybody, nobody will understand
I want a normal life, nothing ever goes according to plan
Should I take away the past with this razor blade?
Or try to fix the mess that i must have made
I made it this far, should I keep going?
I could run away without the world knowing
It feels that nobody is going to love me anymore
Maybe I'm not any body's reason of what they are living for
Maybe I'm just a name with a face
Maybe I'm just taking up space
No one will know how i feel inside
Nobody will know what i think when i hide
I just know that now I'm not sure if i want to stay or not
If i cut again, I'm sure i won't get caught
The one who held me together has left this place
And I'm positive I will never see her god damn face
So as i stumble through life unsteadily
I'll let you know, i can't even tell you what tomorrow will be