Interesting.. good job though

Thank you for the comment i realy like your poems also

I liked this one a great deal, and know that in no way am I being critical, simply suggestive. I've seen such wonderful words from you, there doesn't seem to be any reason why you'd "slang" it all down(You = u, etc...) I'd love to see you tap into a more eloquent side, I think you could be a thousand times better, and you're certainly great as it is.