Opening UP ...not WISE

I never had a care in the world no one else mattered no feeling no smile no tears no heart no life alone I put myself on lock down I closed up all the doors all the things I said every single word was to keep everyone far as away as possible it couldnt have been simplier but there was that one day I began to long for the happinesss everyone else expressed affection of course I hade boyfriends but not one I really gave a care in the world about but then I met someone who made me even want to be there even if the days were bad made me glad I was human and made me want to really express my emotions then he grew on me I fell for him even though I had a b/f I had this urge to break up with him and see if I had this chance with this guy well he broke up with me but I did not care well a little bit I was so happy to see if he acually would give me the chance I longed to hear him say I love you to me knowing I actually did matter to someone but when I let myself outside of what I kept so long shutdown I hurrily rushed in to things giving out what I had not thinking what could happen blinded
by what I thought was love well that didn\'t work out as planned because when I left everything go I let it get taking by someone who fooled me as vulnerable I was he got what he wanted and ran thinking I would just repiece what was left to let someone else in well that isnt happenin im not locked out of what held so close to me crying thinking how stupid I was well im breaking back into my habits and hes never going to be back