Reading the prescription with blurry eyes

I thought it was alright
But I was just as wrong to give back a fight
Pulling the plug that keeps me alive
Well I'd tell you to the same if you went through what I did tonight

OK, I admit, I was wrong to do the whole bottle
But I won't say that I was wrong in flooring the throttle
I know that you wish I didn't follow you all the way
Because if this is what you found, it's the price you pay

Well I'm thinking about giving it up
After seeing what I saw, what I lived was enough
It's only a small amount of pain
For all the worthless souls I've slain

I can't say that I know I'm right
Yet I can't admit being wrong tonight
Reading off these distorted pages is a little hard with this kind of sight
After the whole bottle, you think you're OK, you think you saw the light but you're wrong, and these jet black wolves do bite

I try to let you know that I'm not doing fine
And you just think I'm calling to tell you I need more drugs, so you just drop the line
You and I both know that I'm going to give up soon
Might as well stop adoring the fact that I've got only 6 months until June.

Paper plates lined with crystals dying to stab my soul
So I grab the straw, kill my worries and accept the fact that I'm on a roll
I can get through the day without no pain or worries
But once the skies start die I begin to get jet black flurry's.

And I know it just looks like pixie dust
But it's really just my body and a little bit of rust
The explosion did it all
I wasn't the one to begin the fall

The red ones make me smile
But the blue ones last a while
And I think this one will do the trick
But it just makes me more sick

I know you think that I'm alright
But you gotta see the my version of the light
Like a short simple guitar solo
I burnt out faster than a light Marlboro

Just the icing on the cake
Or the reflection on the lake
Maybe the carving in the tree
Or the lies that told you I was happy

Forget about me, you used to be able to so easy
But the shotgun said it all, don't pick up her call
She'll just hang up like she did last time
I told you I'm going home but you don't understand
My home is down there, under the land

I said to her I won't come back
And all the lies you have in a stack
Combined with all the reasons you lack
Take that shit to the grave
Or use it as a shield from which this poison ain't gonna save.

Come here and look me in the eyes
If you think you could tell me all those lies
And get away with it don't even try
Your mouth is already dry
You already died

Silence in the wake of fear
You see my body now, my dear
Don't look now but as my body detaches itself from the ceiling
It might be regret you're feeling

As the fragments of my bones begin to fall
You might just feel a little small
As if life for you was too tall
Blame yourself, you made me this way, if only you kept that call