For Mom- You'll Never Know

In tears we write our greatest passages, our wants, our hopes, our fears:

You'll Never Know

You'll never know how much fun we had,
the laughs and joy we shared,
You'll never know how much I missed you inside,
how much i wished that you were there,

You'll never know how brave I was,
when I got on scary rides,
or how we all helped each other out,
when the rides really hurt our sides,

You'll never know the memories or stories,
we told along the way,
You'll never know the adventures,
I wanted so much to say,

You'll never know the funny bruises,
left upon my face,
from random hugs of some friends,
because of a silly race,

You'll never know how much i wished,
that you of all people would call,
that you cared to know what i was doing,
that you cared for me at all,

I know u do with all you heart,
and u have your little ways,
but all u could say was "I'm dissappointed,
because you got home so late."

But, guess what?

You forgot that I went to hug you,
and kiss u so many times,
guess u didnt hear me say "thank you,"
for some really memorable times,

You'll never know that I wanted to love you,
I had my speech lined up,
You'll never know that I cried for so long in bed,
until I figured that I had to give up,

You'll never know how much you hurt me,
I swear I'll never tell,
I wont even come out of my room,
until I have a smile that I can sell,

Because that's the game were playing here,
hurting each other in these ways,
should i trully try to be dissappointing?
so that u can trully have bad things to say?

And you know what?

She'll never read this poem,
she hasn't got the time,
things are really rough at home,
I'm sure I'm not the only one,

So I'll say a little prayer right now,
to my imaginary friend,
help me deal with today and even tomorrow,
help this turmoil end.

I dont even know what im sorry for, but I'm sorry mom, trully and deeply sorry.