Dissapear

by Jamie   Sep 11, 2005


Ending sucks...middle sucks...first stanza sucks...lol hmm anyways it's about not having anybody there to talk to

These tears inside
Burn within my chest
These tormenting feelings
Never seem to rest

Waves of heat
Wash over my skin
I give myself over
And take everything in

My body feels week
Every inch feels the pain
And when it rejects
The scars will remain

I know I'm depressing
You made me this way
I don't want to smile
And I'm not f**king okay

I want you to be here
I need somebody to lean on
But I fall to the floor
As I realize you're gone

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Latest Comments

  • 19 years ago

    by Drew Gold

    This is the second poem of yours i've read, and they seem to be primarily about general emotions and not necessarily situation-specific.. you really do a good job of conveying your thoughts/feelings in an easily-relatable way,.. some lines just dont work for me(second stanza, 3rd line + third stanza, 3rd line) but i cant really explain why..

    And I'm not f**king okay

    this was the same line in another poem,.. i think it'd be beneficial to try to be less blunt and state the same feeling in a more poetic way.. so far your writing's pretty good.. id like to see another form/style of yours..

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