My Tribulation

I'm in a world I can't trust
Full of crank addicts and bullshit
How do I know what's real?
How do I get through it?

The scars are a reminder
Of the heart I've lost long ago
They said I'd be ashamed
But it's not so

When a child, I dreamt
Of beautiful lands away from the bruises
Now I'm stuck in a game
But I'm the one who loses

It's been so long since I was happy
It's a dark world of hate
Tears have flowed and scars healed
This isn't the world I once wished to create

They said I'm doing better
That the blade's now a part of the past
But only I know the cravings
Only I know it won't last

Now I dream of hatred
Attacks and a never-ending run
I've been here too long
Let me tell you, it's not fun

I feel like I can't breathe
This world is smothering me
I wish someone could understand this pain
I wish you could see

They've called me insane
They tell me I should die
I've faced the bruises, scars, and heartbreaks
But I still haven't said good-bye

I've been raped and left to die
But the world will never care
And I'm still here
I'm still trying to bear

I've been through anorexia
Bulimia was a long-time friend
They've called me names and put me down
Pushing me to the end

I've lost everyone I loved
And people call me a naive teen
They haven't been through half my shit
They don't understand me

Take a walk in my shoes
You can't live with a pain like mine
This world horrifies me
No longer does the sun shine

Suicide is selfish, they say
But you will never know!
It tears you from the inside out
That's why we crave to go

We wish of a place better
Where the pain has fled
We're sick of pretending
We just wish to be dead!

You'll never know how I feel
You'll never know who I am
I've been looking for a reason
Just so I could give a damn!

I'm older than my years
I've lived for too long
I don't know if I can do it
Not everyone can be so strong

I'm in a world of no trust
So try to be me
Need I remind you
I'm only fifteen