This world is full of so much,
so much hate, so much cruelty,
I'm sick of feeling so down,
i just get pushed down, forgotten.
i try to help, get away from it but,
as soon as i am happy it starts again,
it returns to haunt me.
This feeling is to familiar, as always,
I'm left alone to pick myself up.
but now i just don't feel strong enough,
I'm on my own, i need love, support.
i feel theres a barrier between me and
reality, stopping me from being wanted.
I sit here yet again, trying to figure it out,
but all i end up doing is taking MY reality out of the box.
I unwrap it and continue to create unwanted scars, unneeded pain.
Somehow i feel relief,weight lifted
and no longer trapped inside.
This feeling is only normal,
the usual feeling of being wrong,
being stupid return only to son!
Its just an endless circle of my own misery.
No change, no feeling.
All i ever want is to be excepted, to fit in and be loved.
Somehow i think this wont happen,
not yet not how things stand.
So i will just continue feeling like this,
nothing inside but the lack of love love and
numbness. Always trying, but failing.
Using my way of relief, i find comfort,
FOR NOW...
