Dad

Daddy you just tore me apart,
for the very last time,
you hit me with those powerful words,
shattered my heart away,
you told me you never loved me,
never wanted me anyway,
a mistake you were,
is what you yelled,
why do you think we got rid of you,
dad what did i ever do,
to make you hate me from the start,
i see all these daughters with there daddy's,
here them saying i love you,
tears start rolling from my eyes,
wishing you had loved me,
i look at photos of you,
holding me when i was young,
daddy i want to rip them up,
you looked as if you were paid,
to be there,
you hold me with a beer in your hand,
looking away from the camera,
daddy I'm hurting every single day,
knowing you never cared,
all i ever wanted,
was you as a dad,
all i ever wanted was for you to explain,
my brother was born,
there was so much excitement,
you left me alone,
with no one there,
dad i cant sleep at night,
it brings back bad memories,
dad i have no friends anymore,
cause you brought me up with aggression,
dad, I'm to scared to love,
any sweet caring guy,
because i am scared i will get hurt,
and left all alone,
I'm scared they will be like you,
and always out me down,
because of you,
I'm self conscious, don't have a high self esteem,
because of you I'm always crying,
and there are those painful cuts,
dad why didn't you ever love me,
the way you should have?

- everyone this poem means so much to me if you could please comment, it was the hardest thing i have ever written. please -