Unperfect...

Memories of when I was a kid come alive.
And when they do a peice of me has died.
Flashbacks in the middle of the day.
They leave me with nothing to say.
The sky goes black.
And like that I'm right back.
To the house that we lived in.
And I'm already starting to give in.
The memories of abuse flash in my eyes.
The memories of all your lies.

The feeling of being trapped rises again.
It reminds me of how I felt then.
LOOK AT THE DAMAGE YOU'VE DONE.
I've been like this since day one.
You can't handle what you create.
Dreams and memories and you is what I hate.

Tears stream from my eyes.
And again in my ears I can hear all your lies.
The feeling of being safe dies.
These tears mean nothing to you.
Esspecially when there was nothing I could do.
Dreams of living then kill me at night.
Dreams of watching you and your boyfriend fight.

Look at me now.
I look at that lifestyle, I'm still alive but I don't know how.
You were my mom and you couldn't save me.
Imprisoned by my memories that not even I could free.
No matter how old I am I have to live with that.
And no matter how bad you deny it, you can't bring it back.
Still you try to look at what you did that was good.
But I can't say that, that was in my childhood.
Getting beat almost everday.
Well there isn't anything positive to say.
But look at me now mommy.
This is all Me.
I've done this all.
Even when I've had to crawl.
And I'm not about to stop.
Not when I'm on the rise to the top...

This is to my biological mommy...you did a bang up job with me...thanks for nothing